surrendering

Surrendering What "Could" Be In Motherhood

I've been fighting motherhood since Maeve was born. I have a hard time letting go of control. There is something so hard about surrendering your thought of how parenthood "would" be.

But, the other side has been incredibly beautiful.

It's not Maeve's responsibility to inspire my growth, but she has just by her sheer existence. I'm facing hard truths about myself and areas I need to stretch and improve upon. This is the work I should have been putting in long before I had a child, simply to become a better person. But, I wasn't. She pushes me to see my areas of weakness and make them into the strongest parts of me.

I never realized how resilient I can be until the process of becoming pregnant and everything that has followed.

She's also made me the best version of an artist to date. I've always served mothers, but now it goes much deeper. The way I can empathize and strive to give them an experience that will mean more as the years go by. This time in our lives is all about survival and my mission is to give mothers a few moments of breath...a few moments of letting go of control and expectations.

"I feel there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people: - Van Gogh

Little girl in dress, running into the ocean waves during a colorful sunrise